


it was only a kiss.

by AnxiousCupcake



Category: Miraculous Ladybug
Genre: Aged Up, Alya Césaire Knows, Angst, Confessions, Drama, Fluff, Friendship, Happy Ending, Humour if you squint, Kissing in the woods, So is Nino, Um what else, alya césaire is a good friend, mistletoe kiss, they're all looking out for each other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-29
Updated: 2020-12-29
Packaged: 2021-03-10 19:15:01
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,406
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28402311
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AnxiousCupcake/pseuds/AnxiousCupcake
Summary: “It… It was only just a kiss... right?”She took a step towards him and he kept looking at her, like a lost little puppy. Like a lost little nervous puppy. A lost, nervous, cute as hell puppy that she was so, so mad at right now.She felt rationale leave her brain as she took in the sight of him. She grabbed him by his scarf and pulled him down and planted a kiss on his lips. A single, chaste, but firm kiss. She drew back, glare intact, as she looked into his startled, forest green eyes.“It was onlyjust a kiss, Adrien,” she said, almost mockingly, her hands still bunching his scarf tightly. “Right? A kiss betweenjust friends.”He leaned into her for a second, deeper kiss.( In which it started with only a kiss under the mistetoe between "friends", and they both struggle to grapple with the aftermath of it, while trying not to put their friendship on the line. )
Relationships: Adrien Agreste | Chat Noir & Alya Césaire, Adrien Agreste | Chat Noir/Marinette Dupain-Cheng | Ladybug, Alya Césaire & Marinette Dupain-Cheng | Ladybug, Marinette Dupain-Cheng | Ladybug & Nino Lahiffe (Minor)
Comments: 23
Kudos: 230





	it was only a kiss.

**Author's Note:**

> not beta read, and maybe it should've been, but i have the impulse control of a bird.
> 
> special thanks to [deinde_prandium](https://archiveofourown.org/users/deinde_prandium/pseuds/deinde_prandium/) for her help on this one!

* * *

##  **Part 1**

* * *

It was more awkward than it should’ve been, but Marinette wanted to get this over with. So she sipped on her hot chocolate, watching over the rim of her mug as Adrien settled onto the other end of the couch. 

“So.” 

“So.”

“Couldn’t sleep?”

“Yeah.”

“Me either,” he said, swallowing thickly, and her chest already felt a little tight at his demeanour. She knew this night would end with her crying herself to sleep. 

_Yay._

“I think we should talk about…” he started, looking a little uneasy as he trailed away. 

“ _That_? Yeah. I think we should talk about it too.”

He chuckled nervously. “So…”

“So…?”

“We’re friends…”

She sighed internally. “Yes. Yes we are.”

“...And I kissed you.”

“I kissed you back,” she said wryly. 

“Friends don’t do that.”

“No,” she agreed. “They don’t.”

“But _we_ are friends,” he said looking at her unsurely, as if he thought she didn’t think so anymore. 

“Yeah, we are.”

“Nino doesn’t think so,” he said slowly. 

Her heart raced as she felt fear seep into her as she wondered what _else_ Nino could have possibly said. She prayed and hoped nothing else, if she were to salvage this. 

Marinette hummed, taking a carefully drawn out sip of her hot chocolate, waiting for him to continue. 

“He thinks it, um, _meant_ something more.” He sank into the seat a little bit. 

Ice seeped into her veins. A part of her wanted to save him from the misery of it all, and make the decision for him. But another part of her, the hopeful, but morbidly curious part of her that had been in love with him for three years, wanted to make _sure._ And leave no room for doubt. 

"Well, did it?" she asked instead, her voice small and she hoped she didn’t sound as vulnerable as she felt. "Mean anything to you, I mean?"

She knew it hadn't meant anything, not really. As well-meaning as it had been, Alya had scoffed at her disbelief, chalking it up to her tendency to catastrophize, and twthat people didn’t just make out without meaning to, but she knew better; knew that they (well, _he_ ) had gotten swept away in the moment - what with the mistletoe hanging over their head, everyone goading them on - and add to that, the fact that he was just a little bit wine-drunk. It was all not very promising. 

"Does it _have_ to mean something?" he asked nervously, and she felt her heart sink. She _knew_ it. She was so, _so_ stupid. She blinked quickly to ward away the rapidly forming tears as he continued, because really she _had_ known better than that didn't she?

"No,” she said. “It doesn’t have to mean anything.”

She ignored the way her heart broke a little as his entire body deflated with relief. "I mean, we both got a little carried away, huh?" he chuckled, a hand going up to the nape of his neck.

She pursed her lips before forcing them into a smile. “Yep. Sure did.”

Finishing the last sip of her hot chocolate with faux relish, she licked her lips clean and looked him in the eye for the first since that evening. 

“Well, I can feel the sleep ‘a-comin’” she said with a hollow laugh, cringing at herself the second the words were out. 

Adrien’s brows furrowed with concern as he stood up along with her. He opened his mouth to say something, but she cut him off; she didn’t think she could bear any interrogation now.

“Good night, Adrien,” she said, gathering the warmth that was left in her to give him a smile. 

“Good night, Mari,” he said, startled at the force in her voice. 

She didn’t think she’d be able to say anything without her voice cracking. She _definitely_ did _not_ want to cry in front of him now. She was going to go back to the room on the first floor of the lodge, maybe wake Alya up and cry herself to sleep against her best friend’s shoulder. 

  
  


It was hard to plaster a smile on her face and pretend like she hadn’t cried her eyes out last night. It was stupid, because she had always _known_ and she had made peace with it, but he had to go and kiss her like _that_. She had not left Alya’s side since that morning, and she was grateful for her best friend’s overprotective hovering tendencies. 

Maybe it wasn’t fair, but she really needed some time before she could talk to Adrien alone again. She doubted he’d really notice anyway, because she was being _very_ subtle and all she was really doing was making sure Alya was at her side.

  
  


Alya and Marinette arrived at their picnic table, four cups in hand. Marinette seemed to hesitate before setting a cup in front of him. “Tea,” she said quietly. 

“Thank you.”

She nodded at him, and Adrien noticed how Alya didn’t have him scoot so she could sit next to Nino. Usually, she’d do that, he’d make a scene and seat by Marinette. Not today though. Today, she sat across Nino at the table, leaving Marinette to sit across him. 

“Sleep well?” asked Marinette.

“Yep.”

“Good. That’s… That’s good.”

“You?”

She stilled, but forced a smile on her face. “Like a baby,” she replied, face hiding in her olive green scarf, just the tip of her nose peeking out as she looked at him from under her lashes. 

“You’ve got, um, a hot chocolate stain on your face,” said Adrien, pointing awkwardly in the direction of her face, suddenly hating the strange awkward tension between them. It hadn’t been this way for so long. And he didn't ever want to go back to that because his relationship with Marinette was one of his most treasured ones. 

She blinked at him before trying to brush it off with her mitten-clad hands. Adrien chuckled at her flailing attempts, before he started to reach across the table. “Here, let me.”

Suddenly, Alya was swatting his hand away. “It’s okay, Sunshine, I’ve got this.” Her grin was a little too wide, and her eyebrows furrowed with a little too much concern as she caught Marinette’s face in one hand before slipping one of her mittens off her other hand to carefully swipe her thumb above Marinette’s lip. “There! All good!”

He watched as a sigh escaped Marinette’s lips. “Thanks, Al.”

“Always, girl,” said Alya with so much seriousness that he got the feeling that she was being thanked for more than just brushing the hot chocolate stain off. 

As the day went by, Adrien noticed that Alya and Nino weren’t pairing off together as much as they used to. And he found himself missing Marinette’s company; the two would often end up hanging out together, a few steps behind their dating best friends. Today however, she was walking in arm-in-arm with Alya and for Nino, clearly, nothing was out of the ordinary. He ducked his face into the warm blue scarf around his neck uneasily. He hadn't really realised just how much time he spent with her until _now,_ when he couldn't.

When they settled down for lunch and the girls went to warm up, Adrien whirled around to look at Nino.

“I think Marinette’s avoiding me.” Adrien muttered to Nino under his breath, as the two watched the girls approaching with cups of hot chocolate that they were already sipping from. 

Nino was slow to reply. “Why do you think that?”

“Well, for one she-” he groaned. “Okay, this is going to sound stupid but she didn’t ask me if I wanted hot chocolate.”

Nino narrowed his eyes. “Yes, that _does_ sound stupid. She _knows_ you don’t drink hot chocolate.”

“But… But she asks everytime anyway,” fret Adrien. 

Nino merely hummed, waving at his girlfriend with a smile on his face while debating if he should just spill. But the dark bags under Marinette’s red-rimmed eyes and Alya’s protective grip on Marinette’s forearm made him hold back. He also didn’t want to lie to his best friend. 

“Would last night have had something to do with it?”

As expected, Adrien had turned red already. “Wh-Why would it, we _fixed_ it. I spoke to her last night,” he replied, flustered. “W-We’re _friends_.”

The word felt strange on his tongue, but it was a truth of sorts that he really needed to hold on to for his own sake.

“Friends don’t make out the way you did, Adrien,” said Nino with a sigh, for the umpteenth time since last evening. “I don’t know what else to tell you.”

“She confirmed she didn’t feel that way!” replied Adrien defensively. He’d had a very mixed response to that, and he was still wary of delving too deep into it. She’d said her piece, that was that, chapter closed, end of story; it didn’t matter how he felt about that. It shouldn't have to because there was really no point in think so much on it. 

“Did she really?” asked Nino skeptically. “Or did she just say, and I’m quoting _you_ , that it doesn’t _have_ to mean anything. Right after _you_ asked if it _had_ to mean something.”

“Nino, she would’ve said something,” muttered Adrien. 

He sighed. “You made out with a girl and then immediately friendzoned her, Ade. Maybe she needs some time.”

Adrien conceded, stewing in his thoughts silently. Truth was that he _definitely_ didn’t make out with Marinette out of his very friendly thoughts for her. He didn’t even remember who had deepened the kiss last night. Just that his mind was addled with some wine, and her wide blue, _blue_ eyes looking at him as she bit down on her lip, cheeks flaming. She was so cute when she was flustered. He remembered the softness of her hands as he had pulled her to him, with what he’d hoped was a suave nonchalant shrug before leaning down to kiss her, when he’d been feeling anything but. He had a feeling that he might have been the one to deepen the kiss, but there really was no telling.

_Darn it._

He’d ruined _everything_ . She was uncomfortable, and he was stupid and everything was just. _Ugh_ . He’d have to fix that now won’t he. And he _would_. 

The key was, of course, to make sure they spent some time together, _alone_ , so he could make it clear to her that nothing had changed. That nothing _had_ to change, and he’d act like everything was normal, which would indicate to _her_ that everything was normal; and maybe in lieu of last night’s conversation, everything would be _just fine_. He would just have to double down on his efforts to make her feel that nothing had to change between them. He didn't want to think about how he felt about that; just that it was what was needed. He was sure.

  
  
  


Marinette didn’t know what to make of it. He was _hovering_ , always touching her in some way and it made her want to cry and explode at the same time. She probably would’ve combusted if Alya’s presence wasn’t keeping her grounded. And so, when he put a hand on the small of her back to guide her into a cafe, when he glared at the group of guys catcalling her as she flitted around in the Christmas Market of the little town so she could find her parents a present, when he laughing blew the snow off her lashes… She took it in her stride. 

She took it in her stride when Alya had handed a shopkeeper her camera with the request to take a photo of them and the shopkeeper asked Adrien to “scoot closer to your girlfriend”, he only flushed a little bit as he leaned in to press his cheek against her. He didn’t bother correcting the shopkeeper, and she knew even Alya had noticed if her curious glance at Adrien was anything to go by. 

( Marinette couldn’t possibly have known that Adrien had noticed what he presumed was an embarrassed flush on her cheeks and he hadn’t corrected the shopkeeper in an attempt to not make things more awkward. He, afterall, just wanted things to go back to ‘normal’, so how was he to know that, and in that attempt, he was overcompensating and forgetting that casual touches like that were _never_ the normal between them. Marinette would know. )

She kept herself from flinching away from his touch, chanting in her head that they were just friends.

_Just friends._

This was just his way of being affectionate, and _nothing had changed._

 _Despite_ the way he’d thrown an arm around her shoulder and was holding her close to him, they were _friends_ and apparently _this was normal._ She was absolutely _cool_ with that.

They had kissed under the mistletoe, and _nothing had changed._

She was still the idiot that was pining after him, and he was still…. _Him._

_Ugh._

Her eyes watered with angry tears as she started to walk more briskly. 

They were heading for a hike in the woods when Marinette had suddenly picked up pace in her walking. He attempted to catch up with her, but that meant leaving behind Alya and Nino, both of whom had their gazes fixed at Marinette in concern. 

“Uh, how about you guys take that trail and I just… Follow her?” called Adrien over his shoulder, eyes not leaving Marinette as he picked up his pace. 

Alya’s instant denial to his statement was lost to the wind and he was already jogging to catch up with Marinette, leaving Alya and Nino behind. 

* * *

##  **Part 2**

* * *

Marinette should’ve known hiking in the woods would be a bad idea. Especially in the evening. They’d all started out as a group and _somehow_ , they’d separated. Well, not _somehow_ , she had been rage-walking, she knew. _Stupid, stupid, stupid._ She could trust that Alya and Nino had tried preventing this but had failed; she could only wonder what’d transpired and cursed herself for being absent-minded enough to miss it. All the same, she wished she could be anywhere but here. 

Arms wrapped tightly around herself, and keeping at least three feet between her and Adrien, she trudged forward in the snow. 

She could at least be grateful for the quiet. 

“Hey, Mar?”

Or not. 

“Do you know where we’re going?”

_No. Because I’m stupid and rage-walked blindly. And you, beautiful innocent idiot that you are, just followed me._

“Vaguely,” she muttered. “Sticking to the worn out path is our best bet.”

“Oh, right,” he nodded. “That… Makes sense. I’ve never done this before, so.”

“It’s okay, not everyone can afford the time and luxury to get away like this during the holidays.” She tried to keep her voice stable. 

“It’s more just my dad actually,” laughed Adrien. 

“Right,” agreed Marinette, her hands tucked into her pockets. “Glad he let you come this year though.”

She heard Adrien sigh before stopping in his tracks. Marinette paused as well, and then turned around to look at him questioningly. “Adrien?”

“Are we okay?” he blurted out, and she was really not expecting such a direct question. She didn’t even think he’d notice. 

“Of course, why do you ask?”

“We’re friends right?”

Her eyes hardened just a little bit. “Of course.”

“Even after… _That_.”

She hated how he referred to their kiss as something so unmentionable, like it was the worst thing to ever happen to him. _That,_ apparently. Was this what it would be referred to as from now on? ‘ _That’_. She felt an irrational surge of anger as she glared at him. 

“ _That_?” she spat. “You mean when we made out like “friends” do?”

Adrien winced and stepped back. “Um… Yes, well, I know the, er, circumstances were… _Unusual_.”

“Unusual,” repeated Marinette, eyes wide as she stared at him incredulously. Then, she just turned around with a shake of her head, starting to walk again. “ _Right_.”

Damn this boy honestly. Looking so lost and confused like he hadn’t just broken her heart into a million pieces, and the worst of it all was that he didn’t even _know_. She didn’t know if that innocence of his made her fall a little bit more in love with him or made her want to pull her hair out. Probably the former, given her ridiculous track record when it came to her feelings for him. 

“It… It was only just a kiss... right?”

 _Why was he doing this?!_ Why was he prying and prodding so much, salt on the wound and all that!

_Only just a kiss._

_Only just a freakin’ kiss._

She whirled around at him and glared at him. 

_That was all that was_. 

She took a step towards him and he kept looking at her, like a lost little puppy. Like a lost little _nervous_ puppy. A lost, nervous, _cute as hell_ puppy that she was so, _so_ mad at right now.

_It was just a kiss between friends._

So. Mad. 

She felt rationale leave her brain as she took in the sight of him. She grabbed him by his scarf and pulled him down and planted a kiss on his lips. A single, chaste, but firm kiss. She drew back, glare intact, as she looked into his startled, forest green eyes. 

“It was only just a kiss, Adrien,” she said, almost mockingly, her hands still bunching his scarf tightly. “Right? A kiss between _just friends_.”

His hands had came up to curl around her wrists, his face pink as he gently pried her fingers off his scarf but didn’t let go. He held on to them as he looked at her, searching for _what,_ she didn’t know. The way this was going, everything was going to be ruined anyway, so what’s ruining things just a little bit more?

“It was _not_ just a kiss to me! It was _anything_ but _just_ a kiss.”

And suddenly, the weight of the world had lifted from her shoulders. The moment the words burst out of her, she was breathless for a moment. All air left her lungs and she stared wide-eyed at him. There was worry on his face, and a little bit of sadness that made her heart ache. 

_Stupid. Stupid. Stupid._

The words were out though...

“And I was _fine_ with that. I mean, I _tried_ to be. It was hard, but for a moment I decided that everything would be okay…”

...And they’d been locked in for so long that now, there was no stopping them. 

“...But _you._ ” She shuddered. “You go and act as if we are _not_ just friends. All these casual touches, out of _nowhere_ a-and when you didn’t correct that _stupid_ shopkeeper-”

“I- I didn’t want to embarass you!”

Her eyes misted over.

“A-And those guys, kissing my cheek and h- _holding_ me like I’m your _girlfriend_ -”

“They were _catcalling_ you!” he said, beginning to get annoyed. “I was just trying to protect you like _friends should_.”

“ _And that’s the problem_ !” she snapped. “To _you,_ I’m the friend you’re trying to protect, but to _me_ , it’s the guy I’ve been in love with for _years_ doing all of those things like they _mean_ something to him!”

Adrien froze, letting out a hushed whisper. “What?”

“ _Ha_ !” she exclaimed bitterly. “Didn’t see _that_ coming did you! Well, there you go. _Now_ you know. _Now_ you know why you can’t just kiss me and ask me if it _has_ to mean something. Because _honestly_ what am I even supposed to say to that! And why you can’t just-”

She didn’t feel his fingers tightening around hers. “Mari-”

“- _Keep_ talking about the kiss like it’s some dark, unmentionable secret of your past.” She paused, frowning. “Well, I suppose that’s not fair of me to say. Maybe it _is_ to you. Maybe you just regret it that much, but that doesn’t mean it doesn’t _hurt_. I can’t really-”

“Mar, can you take-”

“- Blame you for your feelings, can I? Well, technically, your _lack thereof_. No, of course I can’t. I just need some space and I’ll get over you, I swear. I’m sorry, I’m all over the place right now and being so selfish aren’t I-”

“What, no-”

“-Because it’s not your fault. You were right, you got carried away and it’s not your fault that you don’t care, right? I mean, I’m your _friend_ why should you care about a _stupid_ wine-drunk kiss under the stupid fucking mistletoe. It means _absolutely_ nothing to you and that’s _perfectly_ _mmf-”_

And then, he was kissing her, because _of course_ he was.

His hands had let go of hers, one mitten clad hand coming up to rest gently against her cold bitten cheek, and the other had winding itself around her waist as he pulled her close. The startled noise she let out allowed him to deepen the kiss, letting the tip of his tongue trace her lower lip before it found entry into her mouth. His teeth grazed her lips lightly, and she groaned into his mouth. He sighed, his grip around her waist tightening as he began to push till her back hit a tree. Both his hands came up to either side of her face, caging her in as her hands wound themselves around his neck. She could feel his wrist against the apple of her cheek as he leaned further into her, eliminating any and all space between them. 

Their tongues were hot against each others’, as her fingers slipped into his hair. The faint taste of cinnamon on his lips from the snickerdoodle cookies he’d been snacking on, and the musky hint of his cologne made this kiss headier than before.

When they finally drew back for air, she blinked up at him, dazed and struck a little by how red, and _well-kissed_ his lips looked. 

_Oh, god._

“What-”

“You… You weren’t letting me talk,” he muttered. 

_Oh._

Marinette sighed and gently pushed him away. “You don’t kiss someone like that after they’ve confessed that they’re in love with you, _just_ to shut them up, Adrien.”

“I’m sorry,” he said, and even _looked_ like he was.

She brought her hands up to cover her mouth, tried to muffle the sob that was threatening to escape her. But the tears escaped her eyes anyway and when he touched her shoulder with concern, she began to cry in earnest.

“Oh, Mar _,_ please, _please_ don’t cry,” said Adrien, moving to remove a glove off his hand so he could catch her tears against his fingers. Her cheeks were freezing as hot tears made their way down. “You’re cold.”

“‘M fine,” she sniffled. “I’m so sorry.”

He pulled her into a hug, pressing his chin to the crown of her head. “No, you shouldn’t be. I’m so stupid.”

“Yeah you are,” she cried, eyes scrunching shut as he hugged her closer to himself. “Can we forget _everything_ that happened over the last twenty-four hours? Please?”

“I don’t think-”

“There you guys are!”

Adrien winced letting go of his group on her, and turned to see the figures of Alya and Nino approaching them _very quickly_ as they trudged through the snowy trail towards them.

“Where have you guys been!” Alya huffed, just as she approached them. “You were right in front of us, and suddenly you weren’t and- _What did you do, Sunshine, why is my best friend crying_!”

No one said a thing, and the ache that had settled in Adrien’s chest since last night only deepened as he saw Marinette trying to plaster a smile on her face. Alya was scrutinising the two of them with narrowed eyes before pursing her lips.

“You guys kissed again, didn’t you?”

At the same time, Marinette muttered, “I’m actually tired. So exhausted. Trekking. So tiring. I-I’m going back to the lodge. I’ll see you guys during dinner. Ma-Maybe. Alya. Nino. A-Adrien. Bye.”

And before anyone could move a muscle Marinette bolted. Adrien made to go after her but Alya gripped his arm and held him back. She looked at Nino pointedly and he nodded. 

“Nettie, wait up!” And Nino was sprinting after her, leaving Alya and Adrien alone in tense silence. The two of them began to walk towards the lodge as well, wary of the quickly darkening sky. 

“Adrien,” sighed Alya and he reluctantly turned towards Alya. “I love you, you’re a _great guy_ , you know. But Marinette… She doesn’t deserve this.”

Adrien flinched, but Alya continued before he could say anything. 

“She’s been in love with you for as long as I’ve known her,” said Alya sadly, hands stuffed in her pockets and Adrien whipped around to look at her in shock. “Something about your kindness and compassion,” she chuckled.

“B-But… Luka… I-”

“Yeah, they dated,” agreed Alya. “And she was smitten by him. And I remember how you used to get when those two got too touchy feely,” she remarked, shooting him a sly look.

Adrien flushed and ducked into his scarf, looking away but not gracing her with a response. 

“Anyway, you’re right. They did date. And then he went away,” sighed Alya. “It took her quite a while to recover from that. But she did. You guys had gotten closer in the mean time too. Then she told me how scarily easy it was to fall for you all over again, like she’d never even stopped..”

“ _Oh_.”

“Yeah, oh,” muttered Alya. “And I’ll be honest with you, there was this… _Other_ guy in between. A… uh, coworker. Who absolutely worshipped her, and I was… Well, no offense, but I was kind of rooting for him, you know?”

“ _Other_ guy?” asked Adrien, wracking his brain for any other guy that he could think of that could’ve potentially caught Marinette’s interest. “What happened?”

“Well, M thought it wasn’t fair because she was _also_ interested in you _while_ being interested in him,” shrugged Alya. “I… Tried to tell her to make the choice so she’d move on from you but she insisted that he deserved better. And she kept insisting. And through it all, I think he might have moved on as well. That was a whole week worth of sleepovers to hold her together.”

“How did… Why did I never notice any of this? Why did none of you tell me?” he asked, voice hushed and miserable. “I’m a terrible friend.”

Alya wound her arm through his, giving it a reassuring squeeze. “It was during the time Nathalie was terribly ill. You were worked up enough as is, we didn’t want to worry you.”

They walked in silence, before Adrien finally asked, “Why did you want her to move on from me so bad? I’m not… I didn’t know. You have to know I would _never_ hurt her on purpose.” He sounded earnestly distressed. 

“Oh, I know,” she said comfortingly. “But it was hurting her, and I just wanted her to be happy. And you never _saw_ her past all the things she did for you.”

“ _Hey_ , that is _not_ fair, I-”

“Adrien, I’m not blaming you for all _that_ ,” said Alya, rolling her eyes. “It wasn’t your fault at all, but it was hurting her and I just wanted _that_ to stop, you know? And well, I don’t really blame you for all _that_ but I definitely _do_ for the last 24 hours.”

Adrien winced at the stern tone her voice had taken. “Al, look, I just… I care for her so, _so_ deeply. And I’m not going to deny that I haven’t had a crush on her for a while. I myself am only just realising it. But there’s someone else. _Maybe_ ? Huh, well, to be honest I haven’t thought of her like that in a _while_ but it’s just that…”

“It’s complicated?”

“Yeah,” he said, biting his lip.

“Fine, okay, it’s complicated. I get that, _completely_ . But if they’re complicated, Adrien? Don’t go around kissing her like that, not unless you have a substantial answer. You’re only trying to protect _yourself_ there. What about _her_ feelings? And-”

“I _asked_ -”

“Yeah, I _know_ what you said!” she bit back. “Does it _have_ to mean something… She told me you said it like you wished with every fibre of your being that it _didn’t_.”

“I was scared!”

“Well, so was she!” she snapped. “Adrien, she’s been scared of ruining your friendship for years now and that’s the only reason my girl’s never really made a whole-hearted attempt at confessing her feelings for you!”

At the guilty look on his face, Alya sighed and pushed her glasses back up her nose with a deep breath. 

“My point is that, _yes_ , you both are scared. But if you are, then _talk_ to each other. With _honesty_ . You’ll only keep hurting each other if you don’t! She never told you how she felt and so you didn’t think twice about “casually” making out with her, and now you won’t be honest with her about how you feel, and she’s _running_ away.”

“She does that a lot,” muttered Adrien.

“Yeah, and I can tell that’s hurting _you_ . But she won’t know not to do it, if you don’t _talk,_ ” sighed Alya. “And you’re my friend too. I don’t want you hurting either.”

“All I’m saying Adrien, is don’t kiss her again if you don’t mean it. Don’t give her an answer that’s neither here nor there. She deserves better than that. Just… be _honest_ with her. Even if things are complicated, just be _honest_.”

“She does,” he murmured, anxiously tugging at his scarf. “I’ll talk to her, Al. I promise.”

Adrien sighed, eyeing the lodgings that had appeared in their view warily. “I’ll try my best. But will she talk to me honestly or...”

“I know that girl has the tendency to brush everything under the rug,” agreed Alya, seeing where Adrien was going with this. “But I can promise you if you set the ball rolling, she’ll play.”

“Okay,” he said, inhaling deeply. “Okay, we’ll talk it out. All cards on the table.”

“Great.” She gave him a small smile. “And _no_ crying this time, you hear me? _Either_ of you!”

“Yes, ma’am. No crying allowed.”

* * *

##  **Part 3**

* * *

Neither Marinette nor Nino was nowhere to be found when they returned, leaving Adrien to stew in his thoughts. Alya had said to give Marinette her space, so he would and it took all his restraint to not go looking for them. He sat in the lounging room of the lodge where he’d spoken to Marinette last night, staring into the crackling fire in the hearth. 

As he thought back to their conversation last night, and with the new perspective, in his mind’s eye, he thought he could see the tightness in her shoulders, the forced smile and the tension in her body throughout the conversation, as if bracing for impact. He winced internally, wishing desperately that she would show up so he could talk to her. He wasn’t quite sure on what to say yet, but he didn’t think he could go to sleep if he didn’t talk to her tonight. For one, he couldn’t get the feeling of her lips against his, out of his head. He felt his face flush, but despite his denial to both Nino and Marinette, he knew all too well that no, friends didn’t kiss like that; not unless they wanted to. 

He heard the door creaking open and sat up straight to look over his shoulder. Marinette and Nino walked in quietly. Neither of them noticed him watching them.

His chest tightened at the sight of Marinette looking so exhausted and pale; her cheeks were flushed from the cold but the redness of her eyes indicated that she’d cried. 

Nino looked exhausted as well, as he took her coat off to hang on hooks by the door. They exchanged words softly, and Marinette was nodding sheepishly to whatever Nino was saying; he looked stern, but the pinch in his brows gave his concern away. Then, Nino heaved a deep sigh as his face softened and he pulled her into a hug. Drawing back with a gentle smile, he kissed Marinette’s forehead, and said something else to her, before patting her head and heading upstairs. 

It was when he was halfway up when he met Adrien’s eye from across the room. Adrien lifted his hand in greeting as Nino quirked his brow. Adrien’s eyes questioningly flickered over in the direction Marinette had disappeared - probably headed to the pantry - before coming back to Nino in silent enquiry. Nino nodded at him once in reassurance with a smile. Adrien nodded back and Nino disappeared upstairs. 

Adrien started to get off his seat when Marinette entered the room with a steaming mug of hot chocolate, he presumed. Her eyes were on the mug, furrowed in concentration as she blew at it before taking a careful sip. She let out a hum of satisfaction and finally looked up, only to freeze when she caught Adrien’s eye.

“Er, hi.” He waved. 

She was still frozen to the spot, eyes darting upwards and she looked ready to bolt.

“Please, don’t-”

Then she shook her head, before meeting his gaze head on as her body lost some - not all - of its tension. She walked in a controlled manner to sit in the armchair across him.

“Hello, Adrien,” she said, her voice neutral as she plastered a smile on her face. “What brings you here on this _very_ fine evening? Would you like a cup of hot chocolate? Uh, maybe not, I know you don’t like it. I’m so silly, as you know. Anyway, um. Haha, good evening.”

She looked like she wanted the earth to swallow her whole. And while on any other day, he would have been endearingly amused by her rambling, today though, he could see the wariness in her eyes and the gentle defensiveness in her posture. 

“I…” he started, before swallowing thickly. “I like it when you ask me if I want hot chocolate every morning. I like when you do that, and then I tell you that I’d prefer tea with a croissant instead. And you nod sheepishly as if you forget every morning that I don’t, in fact, prefer hot chocolate that much.”

She blushed. “W-Well, I kind of _do_. Who doesn’t like hot chocolate?”

“I missed it when you didn’t ask today,” he admitted quietly. 

Her face crumpled. “I- I’m sorry. I didn’t- I… Felt stupid is all. I just _forced_ myself to remember because I- I wanted to avoid any unnecessary- I had to get… _Ugh._ Never mind why, just… _because_. I’m sorry.”

He didn’t say anything before he fidgeted with his hands, still trying to, at the very least, come up with a speech he could give, but he felt at a loss of words. All he wanted was for Marinette to feel better. And he knew that it would be best to let it go, but Alya's advice rang in his hand and he inhaled deeply before looking at her.

“Is it because you wanted to get… Get over me?”

His voice was quiet, but suddenly the very silence in the room became very loud. He heard her sharp intake of breath as she flinched into the seat, holding her mug protectively against her chest. She looked uneasy. 

“I- I thought we agreed to forget anything ever happened.”

“No,” he disagreed. “You said it, but I never agreed.”

She deflated. “Look, I don’t know why you are so insistent on it. There’s literally nothing left to talk about. We’re both pretty clear on where we stand.”

“Yes, we are,” he nodded. “But I don’t think _you’re_ clear on where _I_ stand.”

She sighed, letting one hand off her mug to rub at her eyes. “I know where you stand, Adrien. You could _not_ have been clearer. Seriously, _must_ we go through this today? I’m so tired already. And it’s Christmas Eve tomorrow and we have _so much_ to do.”

Adrien bit his lip in thought, watching Marinette’s walls start to come up again. Slowly and cautiously he moved to sit at the ottoman at the foot of the armchair, while Marinette watched with perplexed wide eyes.

“There’s still some things I haven’t told you,” he said quietly. 

Marinette sighed. “If it’s about how we’re great friends, I heard you. I get it. Spare me the details.” She started to get up, but Adrien was quick to cage her in from his position, one hand on each of the arms of the chair.

“ _Please,_ ” he pleaded. “Stop running, Mar.”

She stared at him unsurely, debating before giving him a small nod and sinking back into the armchair. “Only because I promised Nino,” she mumbled.

“Good enough,” he said with a small smile. Then he inhaled deeply before looking her in the eye. “I’m sorry for my inconsiderate behaviour this evening.”

“Not your fault, you didn’t know,” she muttered. 

“No, I didn’t,” he agreed, adding hesitantly. “But you should know that when those guys catcalled, I got _really_ angry.”

“As friends do,” she nodded. 

Adrien winced and shook his head. “Yes, but friends don’t enjoy having an arm wrapped around another _friend’s_ waist, or the feeling of their _friend_ pressed up against them. And they certainly don’t derive satisfaction from the envy in other guys’ faces when they think that said _friend_ is their girlfriend.”

“I- I suppose not,” agreed Marinette, looking curious and confused at the same time. 

“What I’m _trying_ to say is, I liked having you that close to me. I liked being able to touch you like that.”

“Oh,” she replied, her face a little pink. “I knew you were a tactile person, Adrien. I get it, I forgive you for that. Well, not that there’s anything to forgive, it’s just who you are. And _we’re_ friends. _Friends._ Yep. And...You don’t have to explain. I’m sorry I blew a fuse, that was so uncalled for-”

“Mar, _no_ ,” he said with a sigh. Hesitantly, he reached out to pluck the mug out of her hands, setting it carefully on the floor next to her chair. He took her hands in his, swallowing thickly before looking back at her. She was blushing harder, watching him wide eyed.

“I’m _trying_ to tell you that I kissed you, and-”

She scrunched her nose. “I _know,_ I was there. And you were drunk.”

“Not _then_ , I meant in the woods.”

“Oh,” she said. “Well, _I_ kissed _you_ first.”

“But _I_ went back for seconds,” he argued.

She grimaced. “Yeah, to shut me up.”

“Do you really believe that?” 

She scowled. “You _told_ me so.”

“What I’m _trying_ to tell you, is that I _enjoyed_ kissing you!”

“Well, kissing _is_... a pleasurable act,” she said slowly. “And I’m not that bad a kisser, so… Thank you, I suppose?” She paused, before pursing her lips. “And we’re… _Friends_ , so you like me the minimum amount at least. So… That makes sense, yep.”

He groaned in frustration, though it wasn’t really _her_ fault. She was just throwing his own words back at him. She’d just gotten it into her head that they were _friends_ and it wasn’t even her fault. 

“I wouldn’t have enjoyed kissing Alya as much!” 

“What’s wrong with Alya?” She asked with annoyance.

Adrien spluttered. “She’s my _friend_!”

“Well, so am I!” she exclaimed with annoyance. 

“That’s _exactly_ what I’m saying!” 

She pursed her lips and glared at him. “Listen, I’ve had a _long_ day. I’m tired. I’m _glad_ we’re friends, and hope we r-remain so…”

Adrien tugged at her hands and pulled her a little closer, and she trailed away as he started to lean towards her, obstinately not breaking eye contact with her. She snatched her hands out of his. 

“...A-And I really need to go to bed, and I know you’re worried about our f-friendship and-... _Hey,_ If you kiss me once more to “shut me up” I _will_ deck you!” 

The last sentence came out as a squeak and she was now pressed into the chair, Adrien hovering a few inches over her, one knee propped up on the seat of the chair, grazing her thigh as both his hands came up to rest on either of the chair arms to hold him steady.

“I _want_ to,” he said with emphasis, not breaking eye contact with her.

“Friends don’t make out with each other whenever they feel like it, Adrien,” she muttered, bowing her head down. “And especially not _me_ with _you_.”

“That’s what I’m trying to tell you,” he said quietly. “I _want_ to, because you’re more than a friend to me. I’m sorry it took me so long to realize it.”

Her head shot up to look at him, shock written on her face. “I-If you say, ‘best friend, I swear to god, I will-”

“Deck me?” he chuckled. “I would deserve it, I said that.”

“Oh.” Realization seemed to dawn on her at last, and though she still looked a little wary, her body relaxed and her eyes were sparkling.

“Yeah.”

“Why didn’t you-”

“It’s complicated,” he said with a sigh, his other leg joining the first so he was now straddling her, mindful of not letting his entire weight drop on her. 

Marinette sighed, letting her head fall to his chest. “Isn’t it always.”

“It’s just… I’ve loved someone for so long,” he started slowly. “That I don’t really know how it feels to _not_ love her, you know?”

She looked up at him with a sad smile. “I hear you. I know exactly how you feel."

“Right,” he said. “I’m sorry.” 

“It’s okay,” she said. “I can’t complain when I’m pretty much in the same boat. I held on to my feelings for you for so long that I… I let someone else slip through my hands.”

“Your… co-worker?” he asked, feeling a twinge of curiosity and jealousy. “Alya mentioned.”

She stiffened and looked up at him warily. “Did… Did she mention who?”

“No,” he said, and felt her relax. He was even more curious now. So assuming a teasing lilt, he asked, “Why, is it someone famous like me?”

“Something like that,” she admitted. “Apparently I have a penchant for unattainable famous guys. Especially blond ones.”

“Oh, he’s blond too? Is it… Is it Pierre?”

“What, no!” she said, startled. 

Adrien looked sheepish. “Sorry, just… You said it was your co-worker and Pierre is the only blond model I know that you’ve worked with. And you guys are pretty close”

Marinette hummed. “Can’t tell you who he is. From a different job.”

“Shame. I’d like to have been able to size up my competition.”

“Adrien…”

“Look, it’s just… I don’t want to be in a position where someone I care for just passes me by,” he said slowly, and Marinette winced, looking away. “I’m sorry, I didn’t… I didn't mean _like you_ , it's just... Well, Alya said you couldn’t choose and how… I just… Don’t want to lose a shot at happiness. Yes, my feelings are a little complicated, but she’s made clear where she stood. And I don’t want to rue over what could have been later.”

“A-Are you saying…”

He plucked her hands out of her lap and kissed her knuckles. “I’m saying I choose _you_. I care for you so much more deeply than I thought possible.”

“Oh,” her voice was wobbly as she stared at him, a mixture of hope and disbelief on her face. 

“I think I’m falling in love with you, Mar. You make me happy. And... I’d like to… I’d like to give _us_ a try. If you’ll have me.”

Her tears began to fall in earnest and she sniffled as she let out watery chuckle. “Yeah. I… I like the sound of that.”

He cupped her cheeks to wipe her tears away with his thumbs before leaning down to kiss her. Her hands came up to his shoulders as he brought her face closer to his as their lips slid over each other’s. He flicked his tongue against hers, relishing in the throaty moan she let out, and he thought he could commit to memory the way she was delicately sucking on his lower lip.

She tasted like hot chocolate, and nothing felt more right than this.

They drew back for air, and he smiled at her. “I have a good feeling about this.”

She giggled as he kissed her forehead. “Me too.”

**Author's Note:**

> also plagg and tikki are in the lodge cuddling, okay? xD
> 
> anyways...
> 
> send asks or questions about this fic, or anything mlb and i'll be happy to discuss! :D - [activechataclysme.](https://activechataclysme.tumblr.com/)


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